Life And A Drop Of Water

I am the water at the mouth of the stream.
From the stagnant pond that was my home.
I see not what lies around the bend. I set forth, afraid to go.
More afraid to stay.
It is not lack of fear or presence of courage that propels my flow
across the cold, jagged rocks beneath me.
I move onward, because I must.
That first moment- from stagnancy to motion- simultaneously takes my very breath
and causes me to gasp
for new air.
All is unfamiliar. I know not my surroundings, yet, onward I flow…taking the shape of my new container, larger, and molding myself around each obstacle in the stream-
The jutting boulders, the sudden, low limbs I narrowly miss as I
swirl
splash
meander
my way to newness.
I move slowly as the stream widens, flattens, shallows-
tranquility rests on me briefly.
Then
the water narrows, deepens. I am raging
wild
tumbling
breaking
unable to swerve- colliding madly into the banks- I ricochet. I am suffocating in the depths that draw me downward as the darkness prophecies this day as my last.
The sun sinks. Thick and black, my void as I seep into the earth. From all directions my sources are drained from me.
Motionless.
I become small. I am absorbed by nothingness, as suddenly, I come to rest upon the thirsty root of some vast flora. Though light evades, yet, I sense my purpose as the roots drink me in and I nourish the majesty of a tree as old as time. And, I rest. Giving all of myself to the wholesome act, I am filled with peace indescribable. As comfort becomes familiar, I am joined again by the waters with which I traveled in the river. From all directions, my source collects around me-
Two drops. Four. Eight.
Until
I am, again, a stream. Making my way through the mountain that had been my dark and unavoidable obstacle. As the long passage widens, light enters, and I trickle through the crags, high above the earth below. The sun so hot, in the long tumble downward, I evaporate into nothingness, once more.
I have vanished.
Two lovers absorb the rays of warmth and shade of the very tree I nourished.
I am
no where.
The universe has forgotten and I have no role. As I dissipate, I glimpse the stream where I once traveled and for the first time
see
the
ugliness
of the stagnant pond
I once called home. Upward I fly, ever smaller, until in the distance far above- a cloud- immense and terrible. I feel the first chill as the sun’s rays are blocked and, drop by drop, I am reunited with a million particles from my stream. In new form, I travel through the heavens- surrounded by my self, no longer by myself. All of us, at one time, a mere vapor. All of us having made the isolated journey through nothingness
to be here…taking in the beauty of all that is
beneath
above
around
within us.
Still no knowledge of my journey yet to come. I am now unafraid. Profoundly moved by my own tranquility, I bask in the perfection of my path. I am not alone. Not without purpose. Winds sweep me onward for miles into my new world. I am equipped.
For my next role.
My calling.
The cloud halts, hanging gloriously beneath the heavens, I am in awe of the sight below.
I am above the sea. My source, from whence I came.
Eager
to break away and fall into its beckoning presence. I struggle and fight to join the trillions of droplets that have found their way. But. I am suspended.
Motionless.
Forced into awareness that I am and have always been a part of this haven. I was never alone. Never apart from. Never without purpose.
Nothingness was a hallucination. A lie. A finite grief. A myth of my mind.
Each turn in the stream
Each inch of the blackness in which I seeped and separated- the smallness I felt as I vanished in the sun’s intensity-
Always, I was held.
Guarded.
As I found my way home. Only then was I released in a blissful tumble, watching with anticipation, the ocean growing larger- closer- I close my eyes and I am engulfed
safely
completely
I am home.
I am the water at the mouth of the stream.

 

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